If you remember at the end of the last part, we had just found out that our daughter needed dental work asap. However, we had no money for the procedure and we had a deep conviction that God did not want us to go into debt. We had seen Him provide for our previous debts and bring us back to even keel, however, this new news along with no money in the bank left us a little down and out.
We turned to the only thing we knew, God. We (Katie and I) came together in prayer and we asked only what we knew to ask, God please provide.
Each time we would take one step forward, it would feel like the next ten were backwards. We, like anyone else, struggled with doubt. How could God ever answer prayers that seemed so undoable? Remember, we were praying for a new truck, dental work for our daughter, and land down toward town where we longed to be. All together, this would be over $250,000 and my biggest income in the past three years was a little under $40,000.
On top of the normal doubts, I struggled with "Why would God do this for me?" After all, who am I in the grand scheme of things. Just a little spec in the vast ocean of sand. Why would He see the need to reach down and bless me when others in the world struggled just to eat on a daily basis?
This is where He took me back to George Mueller's story. Many times George would have a notion to move in a direction, but before he would, he always would stop and ask God to confirm in his heart that this was His true direction.
I want to emphasize that this was a journey. A difficult one. My heart and mind wrestled with the truth I knew from Scripture. I really wondered why God would want to bless me. This oft times made me struggle to pray and ask Him to meet our desires. However, these desires, especially the one to be back closer to town and remain out of debt, grew daily. With the strengthening of these desires, I became certain this is what He wanted, so our prayers intensified.
It was not long before, God began to be more specific with me, and our prayers became more passionate. What He did next was truly amazing!