A Heart's Ache

This morning I enjoyed a very sweet time in conversation, reflection, and prayer with a brother in Christ. We have known each other since college and for the past several years been praying about the things God is doing in our lives. Today was one of those mornings you simply wished wouldn't end. The time of prayer was so rich and deep, I really just wanted to stay there. However, the reality of this present world and previously set appointments came to be, so we smiled, hugged, and moved on.

This time though really enlarged my hearts cry that has recently been even more alive. I spoke the other day to another friend and asked what Jesus was doing in his life. His response was to speak of the aching of his heart. How his prayer times and praying through the Psalms (fantastic thing to do by the way) simply led his heart to ache even more for God. Not to do more for God, just to simply KNOW God.

How my heart resonated with his words and my soul cried out, "Yes God, that is the ache of my heart! I want to simply Know You!"

But things of this world, cares and concerns of this life, steal, kill, and destroy this simple heart ache. Every particle in this fallen world is opposed to me simply knowing and trusting God. We give in to the false dream of living an enriched life and therefore we rack up debts to enjoy simple moments of this world. Those monthly bills never cease to come, so we concern and burden ourselves with making sure we can get by. We all loved to be liked, and so we go online to build up more friends than any one person could imagine, yet we really do not know those who have clicked to be our friend. We long for acceptance, so we blur the lines of what God may or may not accept in order to receive acceptance from our peers and co-workers. We want to be able to earn God's acceptance, so we formalize a box of rules and regulations in order to be able to attain a life of which he approves.

Yet we walk away from all this, unfulfilled, unsatisfied, and longing for something more.

When all along, God has said to us simply COME! Be Still! Know! Believe! Trust!

Come to Me all you who are weary and heavy laden, I will give you rest! Matthew 11:28

Be Still and Know I am God! Psalm 46:10

Know that I (God) Love You! Romans 8:37-39, John 3:16, Romans 5:8, 1 John 4:7-8, Psalm 86:15 and many more

Turn around (repent) and believe the good news of the Kingdom of God! Mark 1:15

Trust. Proverbs 3:5-6

Ahhhh..... There is that word, Trust. Sitting there oh so small, yet carries so much weight. God calls for us to trust Him. Trust that he loves us. Trust that he cares for us. Trust that He will take care of our needs. Trust that his Son's sacrifice settled the debt we owed. Trust that He will never go back on His word. Trust He will care for us much more than he cares for the birds of the air. One would think this would be a simple task to accomplish, yet trusting the most trustworthy Being seems to rake against the fiber of our souls which are filled with mistrust.

Yet, in that single, simple word, lies the crux of it all. The fulfilling of the ache that our heart bears when we long for all those things to be fulfilled. To be loved and accepted just like we are. God says He does, but do we trust him. To be liked like we are, God says he does, but do we trust him. To know He holds tomorrow in his hand, God says he does, but do we trust him. To know our needs will always be met, God says He will, do we trust him. To believe he cared enough to be close to me that He gave up his only son to have me, God said He did, but do I trust Him?

My heart aches to Know God more deeply than ever before, and His heart aches for me to know Him more deeply than I ever have before, yet there is one little word standing in the way, Trust!

Your Brother in Christ,

Ray Carman